Evil Boy 

Summer Camp

If I remember I will take a picture and see if I can upload it to the blog.
Then I could point out different people ate camp with me. Having no picture, but too much freetime right now I will run down the top people, their nicknames, and what they are known for

Bruce -really name William, said he had "dangerous erections, asking questions that are really statements that hold the class over for time
Typhoid Mary - Leslie, got everyone sick, may still have pink eye
John Diddy - John, love hip hop, hitting on girls, and being a braggart
Metro - Brian, 5 kids, maybe a metrosexual and talks more on cell phone, than 99% of class
Keith or Fanface - almost hit face with fan or fan with face, interesting fact was married a week and a half, caught wife cheating on him, only lefty and smoker of camp
Janice - might be the oldest person there, calls everyone hun
Redbeard - me, apparently on the top of the TMI list
Chickenhawk- Brady spends time doing obvious bimbo things so that the other Male camp members, especially the members from different groups will notice her, in attempts to hook her a husband (also known as damage goods)
Lorraine - although from Eugene, "is not a tree hugging liberal"
Remedial - Eric, restating the obvious and making statements that drag the class out
Popeye - Merissa, who has the most incredible facial pains when remedial talks
Javelin - no her name is Javelin, whose statement of the week...
"What do you mean ladies hide razor blades in their vaginas?" her
"I don't know the mechanics of it, since I don't have one but I know it can be done" guy
"How?"
Followed by a discussion about without the plumbing or real experience it is hard for a male to describe or really discuss how that is possible
I know I am forgetting several people but what the hell do I know.

Things Not to Yell

Sure a simple enough title thing and something you would think would be common sense. But sometimes lack of commonsense is special power. Sure, I may be a total idiot, but other times I am really good at what I do, but then there are the rest of the 16 hours in a day.
Examples...
- When you see a guy in your dorm hall with chocolate milk, don't yell "I am going to pour that chocolate milk up your ass!" in front of authority figures
-don't say "he is trying to get ALLl UP INSIDE YOU!" to casual acquaintances
-don't call people "tea bagging douche bags!", even if they deserve it
-don't tell about people about "dangerous erections"
-don't mention mental illness
-don't mention the fact that you are new at your job and would like your clients to train you, which will lead to them jumping you and trying to get "ALL UPSIDE of YOU".
Yes, I know I did not say some of these things, but hell they were funny when I heard them.
Remember kids, don't piss on me and tell me it's raining

I am full of tiny men

Day 3 at Adult Camp
2 hours of intro to justice (I will kill you with 2 hours of snore inducing crap)
2 hours of intro to job (now that you have been working a year and a half here is what your job will be like
4 hours of intro to use of force (by far the most interesting). I can kill people, whoopee! Well maybe only wound them until they submit.
Anyhow our class had a physical exam, which was only 4 laps, instead of the usual 6. This is due to the fact that for some reason 6 laps doesn't apply to our job, but the last 30 classes did it. Anyhow, out of a class of 30 I had the fastest time. I beat the four younger guys and the military guy, so I was happy about that. The crappy thing is at the end of camp we won't be tested again to see if we improved. Still my favorite is the older guys and gals running it and nearly falling over. Only one guy puked and hit a huge fan with his face.

The bad things is that I miss my dogs and my wife very much. Yes, I put the dogs first, but if I don't everyone will know how much I love my wife, she rocks!