DRY Landie

Adventures I have at my "adult camp":

Explaining to other professionals, that your employer doesn't allow for certain training. Explaining to them that you don't use most job related equipment.
So now that I have thrilled you with a written memo of my adventures I shall elaborate. My job sent me to an academy to learn better safety techniques. Other counties sent there employees as well, a total of 30 of us. It is a nice mix of people. Unfortunately we are in one of the smalliest college towns in this state, which also used to be the last dry county, so that mean all of the "excitement" of alcohol, must be pursued else where, mainly any of the small cities, or big cities east or south. Because there are only so much to do in town after 5 pm.
But with nothing else really to say, let's discuss the finer points. 8 hours of class, college student who dislike you for no reason, no car, no bars, the food is good, the dorm mattress are slightly post WWII, and all i really want is a Pepsi, just one Pepsi, but she wouldn't give it to me, just a Pepsi.....
I miss my wife, I miss my dogs, I want do things. Maybe this is to teach me a lesson about sitting on my arse. I don't think I was appreciating the fact of cars and bars, and mobility.

Yes, Virginia there are morons

Wonder What the labels Says?
Not only am I a member of reading for idoits...I am also the president.
So the question of the day...has anyone heard of Skankin' Pickle?

I got needs

The joke of medical marijuana cards now is that at least 50% of those who have them, are full of it. The intention was for people who were "seriously ill", have a way to cope, even if it is unconventional. I believe most folk didn't have problem with that. But now a huge amount of people decide that marijuana is the "only medicine" that can make them better. That's right in the years of human existance and science, smoking a plant is better than anything that a doctor could prescribe.

My favorite examples of the misuse, are
1. hurt knee playing basketball, couldn't be bothered to have surgery, gets medical marijuana card. continues to play basketball

2. has bad hands, works as a landscaper (never actually has job), but won't get (if your not working anyway how do you "get" another job?) another job

3. you, could until recently, fax a request to a doctor in Oregon and he would give you a card (sadly I believe his license was revoked and he might have some jail time to serve). There was at one time 1 doctor okaying cards, which accounted for 80% of the cards in Oregon. The same doctor who would advertise in the paper and work out of a motel. Damn that sounds reasonable

Granted of all the things in the world marijuana isn't the worst, but be responsible. Don't cry wolf all the time.

Pass the Time

Take a mental holiday and read through as many blogs as you can. Hell I thought life was a big cluster of turds. I can't stop now, reading what a canadian 40year old does it hypnotic, even more than playing Fable. It gives you a weird sense of small books unfolding infront of your eyes. Each story has something "interesting", again "interesting" can mean crazy. When I get around to reading my 20th one today, it makes work seem less like a task. Hell, what do I know?

I know that I have the old negative to some pictures from college. I wonder if I can get them scan them to a disc and then put them on the computer. I will only release blackmail pictures quarterly, as they will effect my stocks. Buy NOW. Fozcorp - needs investment capital to start the BEER Olympics and other such great products and ideas {all rights reserved, void in Kentucky}.

I will be forced to cut back on posting things, due to limited access to computer while at work camp. I will be gone a month and back in town on the weekends and will have little time for the computer, so do not get disc heartened. My brain will swell with crazy theories about the universe.
I wonder if crazy entitles me to a medical marijuana card? I got glaucoma bitch!

Never Too Tired

i am never too tired to be crazy. i have free time, dog time, work time, video game time, shower time, and occassionally hammer time. Time is a tricky thing. I need more practice at the weekend and less at work week time. Man, I can't wait until it gets warm, I am taking my family to the lake and we are doing nothing!!!! That's right!, lots of it. This rain, fog, and mud can suck a donkey.

If your not supposed to Hate your job

Why I hate my job...By jessica simpson (or me, both of us aren't worth a damn!,except no one wants to see me naked.)

I hate my job. Not hate like hating a child molesters or such, but I can think of about ten things that I would rather be doing even if I was filthy rich like Karl Malone (yes Karl Malone what a turd).
Now you are supposed to hate about 67% (proven by scientific elves) of the jobs you have in your life. Granted dishwashing, cleaning up crap, working fast food, driving a cab, changing oil, and talking to losers, can all be bad for various reason and at various times. Jobs that suck as a kid, really suck as an "adult". Now I have worked with juvenile offenders, the mentally ill, the mentally ill brain injured, and criminals. All jobs have had there ups and downs. BUT, today maybe even this week, and most of next week, have an odor of suck. Why, First due to poor planning and poor management I have to cover my old job. Not because the person is sick or any other real emergence. I am covering a 2 man operation that rarely uses the other person, because they are doing the supervisors job, so of course the supervisor goes out of his way to help the one person. Damn if that person couldn't do it her self or they should of, oh I don't know planned ahead. So now I sit at a stupid ass desk for four hours, while my voicemail piles up with messages (17 every morning, which only take 3 hours to clear) at my desk. The best part is when co-workers ask "why the hell are you here?" When they walk by. That is the same question I am asking myself. When I held my old job, it was life or death that I be there or the ice age of shit storms would happen, I would get guff for going to the bathroom, or this is the best helping co-workers. It not like I don't have 3 classes to teach, papers to submit, training to attend, heaven forbid one person be put out......

So this just one big piss and moan session.

Beer Olympics

I would like you all to send money to my house (checks made to cash), so that I will start the International Olympic Beer Committee. For a base donation of $100,000 you can be part of this breaking movement, that will bring peace, through responsible drinking and some athletics. Scheduled events are: (preliminary events scheduled)

1- pints and soccer
2- foosball
3-football (all countries bring a team a truck load of beer)
4-downhill tubing
5-slip and slide
6-human catapult

Yes, these sports will forever be etched into the annuals for history

The Results

this is it
So I named the purple on swimmey

The Video Game Cult

All hail the video game. There is nothing better than spending a little time saving the universe, raiding villages, or defeating the Nazis. "Die Nazi, Die" never gets old. A GREAT co worker has lent me Halo and Fable. Granted Halo 2 is out and is awesome, I need practice, so I can kick Chris's ass like I did with GoldenEye. Your ass is mine Chris!!!!!!!!! I just thank Alvis and Jebus that I can take the Xbox to the Academy, so i can escape the boredom monsters.

go Vikings!

this just in

i got good swimmers, not damage after surgery. they know which way to go and what not. so to the millions of concerned authorities, be very frightened

fuzzzy dogs It worked. the children live. i like to tell you my dogs names are satan and kitten chewer, but there not. (besides they can't catch cats)
Anyhow ...Ripley and Looby, the children in my fragile little world

Dog Explosion! This is the best picture. My dog love to bite at things I shovel or throw and my pirate crew capture her in mid flight...Tremble before the might of flying dirt assassin.

sideways picture of the landscape 

lets see

hopefully there will be pictures of the dogs. hopefully yeah they might be fuzzy, due old camera

Torture

I am sure that most people know, like porn, know it when you see it.
Which brings me the to the point that being naked for a picture is considerably different that ethnic cleansing. So having said that now to talk of things of winter.
It is frickin cold. Why don't people hibernate? I want to dig a hole or have a room that I can pile full of blanket, pillows, and stuffed animals, and take a 3 month nap. I can do so much in yard and so much in the house. The lack of sunlight during some weeks start to drag out the day and reminds me one big environmental cubicle.

Fun with Hammers - the musical

AM fun...

So if you know or don't know I am having my plumbing checked, to see if the trauma and surgery (if you missed the two surgeries, then you missed the good stuff and that is another story), it is good to make sure that all highways are clear and that everyone can pass the physical. So I have to give a sample to the lab. More on that tomorrow ......well couldn't wait.
there is something odd about driving around with your own sperm specimen, trying to keep it the right temperature and wondering, "good goggley moggley what if I am in an accident?" Forget having clean underwear. I don't want the investigator looking over the scene and thinking, "Looks like a standard accident. WAIT! What the hell is that? Who drives around with...A...A...oh god I touched it! Hey Fred, we got a weirdo." Now imagine how many great stories they have to tell you. I know their jobs probably give them a lot of great stories, just like mine, but I don't want to be another person story. God knows I am already part of so many other stories. Such as...I think that guy has terets (spelling doesn't count) all he says is profanity or who the hell is that and why is he doing that. Then again it is kind of fun to be parts of a story. There will always be Tbz, humping (a joke) a bush in front of the dorms, when we would return drunk. That bush took a beating and eventually looked like a saddle at the end of the first term. GOOD TIMES. I will most likely ask my friends to submit their favorite stories, because ....well why not.
And I am off point. Anyway specimen delivered, no accident, mission accomplished. And remember I would show you my scars, but you don't really want to see them..

Voldmort attacked my sack!

Learning how to use this damn thing

now if i could only email this to all so that i don't have to remember what magic word is. This thing is trying to make my head hurt

Daily wiz

Day 1

Note to All. I know nothing and will continue to state that. Spelling only counts in certain spots. I would say nothing wild, but that is crock. I wonder what the point of a blog is other than mini site for your own personal exploitation. We shall see....